The ear infection

After almost a full month of dealing with this ear infection, this is Emily. What a sweet wonderful, cheerful baby girl. If only you were at OUR HOUSE at 2 am!
1. Emily has been through so much for this stinking ear infection. She has gone through two different oral antibiotics, each lasting ten days, and then when both failed to knock out the infection, she went through a 3-day series of Reciflin (sp?) shots. That didn't work either. SO now here we are after four rounds of antibiotics and the poor girl still isn't sleeping well at night. In the course of the last month we have had so many sleepless nights it is unbelievable. We have made 1 am car rides, pharmacy trips, 2 am parties in the living room on the couches. Enough is Enough. I am SOOOO ready for tubes. Tubes can't be as harmful as jacking her little body up with antibiotics, don't you agree, or am I wrong?

2. Whenever I am awakened at two in the morning my first though is "Holy crap... not again, please Lord, anything but this! I just want to get some sleep!" And then my second though immediately following is, "Holy crap... I am such a selfish bad mommy for thinking of my own lack of sleep and not the pain that Emily must be in to wake up in the middle of the night." Her being sick constantly makes me question my abilities as a mom. "Should I let her cry it out, or is she in pain, do I cuddle and rock her to sleep, even though we have gone through the Ferber method to much success, and I surely don't want to undo that!" It is amazing how much I question myself.

3. Finally, the third thought on this ear infection is how in the heck to single parents do it? I don't know what i would do if I were in this by myself. Thank goodness for Scott. He got up with her last night, and eventually I got to go back to bed. He set up what he likes to call "the fort" in living room (he pushed the love seat and sofa together.) And he patiently loved on Emily and snuggled her until she fell asleep. I can't imagine what it would be like to go through the many sleepless nights without a spouse to help. I have a whole new respect for single parents, that's for sure.